love

The Importance of Having A Hobby

Posted on by sassyvibe

Finding activities that you enjoy doing is critical to living a healthy life. Having interests and hobbies that are all your own make you who you are. After moving in with my boyfriend about 2 months ago, I realized just how important having a hobby or 2 is. I’m always looking for new hobbies to pick up, but here is what I enjoy doing at the moment:

  • Reading
  • Baking
  • Crafting/DIY Projects
  • Nail Art
  • Blogging

I am always, always, ALWAYS looking for new hobbies to start. Let me clarify – I’m always looking for affordable hobbies. Being a woman in her 20’s, living on her own for the first time and having those awesome things called student loans, having an expensive hobby is out of the question. BUT, I’ve also realized that spending my money on things that make me happy is also important. Crafting can get pricey, depending on what it is I’m tackling that night, but it’s something that brings me joy. I keep this in mind when I walk out of Michael’s 2 hours and $100 later – oops! I’ve made plenty of decor items around my apartment, and I don’t plan on stopping.

Most of my free time is at night, since my boyfriend goes to bed right after dinner to get up at 2 am for work. Gross. Needless to say, I have hours and hours by myself at night. And since acquiring this immense amount of free time all week, I’ve really had time to reflect on how important it is to have hobbies and interests. Not all free time is meant to be spent working or cleaning. Doing something you enjoy just because you enjoy it is so important for your mental health. If I spent every moment I had cleaning this apartment or answering work emails, I would go insane!

What would I do if I didn’t have at least a couple hobbies of my own? Simply sit here and wait for my boyfriend to spend time with me? Clean my apartment Monica Geller style every day? (If you haven’t watched Friends, you obviously live under a rock. And I believe I just found you a new hobby. You’re welcome.) That’s not to say I do everything on that list every day. There are plenty of nights that I veg in front of the tv until it’s time for bed. And that’s okay, too!

Hobbies are so much more than a way to pass the time. Hobbies have the power to bring you out of your comfort zone, if you let them. They can help you discover who you are. Or help mold you into who you want to be. While it is important to spend time with people that you love, it’s also critical to spend time with yourself, doing what you love.

 

 

Things I Want My Future Son to Know

Posted on by sassyvibe

Dear (future) Son,

Hi there. It’s your mom. I know we haven’t met yet, but I have some things I want you to know.

Please be yourself. It doesn’t matter if the world thinks you should like blue, or if you’re “supposed” to play with trucks instead of dolls. If you like it, if it makes you happy, do it. Keep it. It doesn’t matter what anyone else on the planet thinks.

I want you to remember to be compassionate. Don’t let this world make you hard. Don’t let it shrink your heart. Compassion. Empathy. Kindness. These are what make the world go ’round. Be a part of it.

Stand your ground. It’s sacred.

Work hard. Don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty. Laziness is the most unattractive trait a man can have.

Build your kingdom. Find your queen. Don’t let her go.

Be chivalrous. Respect women. 90% of the women you meet will probably tell you they don’t believe gentlemen exist. Prove them wrong. (Don’t worry. Your father and I will teach you.)

Relationships are not 50/50. They are 100/100. Both people should be putting everything they’ve got into making it work. Being with someone is just that – work. So don’t be afraid to put forth the effort. If it’s the right person, it will be a constant reward.

If it’s not something you would say to me, and it’s not something you’d want another guy saying to your future daughter, don’t say it.

Don’t be afraid to admit when you’re wrong. Everyone makes mistakes. Apologies aren’t always easy, but sometimes they are necessary.

Pick. Your. Battles. This is one of the biggest, most important lessons I have learned, and continue to learn.

Continue to grow. Learn new things. Take the world by storm. There is so much to see, so many people to meet. There’s culture to experience, and food to eat! So much food!

Read. Feed your mind. Literature is the best way to escape and the funnest way to explore your imagination.

Don’t build your walls too high. Everyone protects their heart. But please don’t guard it too hard. A loveless life is a lonely life.

Let your loved ones know you care. Tell your family you love them. Tell your friends you love them. You’ll never regret the times you said “I love you.” It can never be said too many times.

The day you come into the world, I promise to do my best to teach you to be the best man you can be.

Love,

Your (future) Mom

Things I Want My Future Daughter to Know

Posted on by sassyvibe

Dear (Future) Daughter,

Hi, it’s me. Your future mom. You may not be here yet, but there are some things I want you to know.

I want you to know that you are worth everything. You are worth all the time, effort and energy a person can give. So if they’re not making space for you in their life, they’re not worth your time.

I want you to know that you can do anything in the world, but you may not be able to do everything, and that’s okay. Please do not let the fear of missing out on one thing hold you back from experiencing so many other things. The world is your playground, and I hope you spend your life having fun. It’s an adventure.

You have the power to create your own fate, even when you are feeling powerless. Strength comes from within.

I want you to love yourself. No matter what anyone else around you looks like, you are perfect exactly the way that you are. You are not made to fit inside a box – yours or anyone else’s. Our bodies are incredible creations – don’t waste your time hating yours.

They called you bossy? Good. Be the boss.

I want you to know you are going to mess up. Life isn’t always going to go your way, and you might put yourself in a pickle every now and then. And that’s totally, 110% okay. It’s normal, in fact. I want you to know you can always come to me for help, but you have to learn to help yourself, too.

It’s okay to feel lost. It’s okay to not know who you are. It’s said that life is a journey, and those are true words. It’s a journey that should be spent finding yourself, finding happiness, and finding love.

I want you to know that love is gentle. It should not steal your energy, it should not steal your self confidence. Love should lift you up, it should nourish your soul. Love should feel like home.

But that doesn’t mean love won’t hurt. That doesn’t mean your heart won’t break. Sometimes, you’ll have to break your own heart. And I’ll be there for you to pick up every piece.

Stand up for what you believe in, even if it’s hard. You may face ridicule or self doubt, but trust your gut. Don’t give up on your values or your character – they make you who you are (and who you aren’t.)

Don’t apologize for being you. Don’t ever apologize for feeling a certain way, or thinking a certain thought. Your mind is beautiful, and your heart is pure. Be unapologetic-ally you. Always.

The bravest thing you can ever do is ask for help.

I want you to know that a man cannot define you. He cannot control you, and he cannot contain you. Don’t forget this.

Please cherish the people you love. It may seem sappy, silly or embarrassing. But showering your family and friends with love is the kindest, most important thing you can do. No one is going to be around forever. And you’ll only regret the times you didn’t say “I love you.”

 

I want you to know that this world…it’s big, and it’s scary. But it’s also beautiful, and majestic and mysterious. Someday, when you grace this world with your presence, you’re going to love it.

 

Love,

Your (Future) Mother

Career vs. Job

Posted on by sassyvibe

What is the difference between a job and a career? Some may not see any difference between the two. To me, these two words couldn’t be more different. We’ve all heard the phrase “If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life.” When I was younger, I didn’t really get it. All grown ups work every day! As I’ve gotten older and held many different positions in many different fields, I began to understand.

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A job pays the bills. It lets you survive. It gives you means to live. A job is something to be grateful for. Even on my worst days, where it seems impossible to get out from under the covers, snuggling with my cat, and sit at a desk for 8 hours, I remind myself that I am incredibly lucky. This job provides me with (almost) everything I need or want. This wonderful apartment I live in with my boyfriend, a car that takes me where I want to go, a cell phone to stay connected to everyone, and money to buy food (which is my favorite, to be honest). I know I am very fortunate to have a job with such a wonderful company, when many people my age are still wishing to have a position like this.Like I said, it gives me ALMOST everything.

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So what does this job not give me? It doesn’t give me anything to be passionate about. Although I don’t hate my job, I don’t look forward to it either. It doesn’t drive me to get out of bed (willingly), and it certainly does not feed my creative need. A couple years ago, I worked at a cupcake shop doing what I loved. It paid like crap and the hours were scarce, but I was embracing my passion. I worked two other jobs that I pretty much hated in order to be able to do one thing that I loved for a few hours a day. By the end of that summer, I was exhausted, burnt out and probably a little delusional. Seriously, I think I got about 8 hours of sleep a month. I was basically a zombie. But you know what? I was a happy zombie. When someone would ask me what I did for a living, I was so incredibly proud to be able to tell them I worked at the cupcake shop. Partly because I was putting what I learned in college to good use and, let’s face it, the number of graduates actually using their degree is terrifyingly low.

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Eventually, I quit all 3 of my life-sucking jobs to have one full-time job. Mostly because I felt like I hadn’t slept in a year. Fast forward 2 years, and now I’m sitting at my desk on the 12th floor in this big building, for this big company wondering what the hell I’m doing. Don’t get me wrong, this job isn’t bad. But it doesn’t give my soul what it needs. It doesn’t allow me to be creative, it doesn’t allow me to help people, or help animals. All of these are things I would look forward to doing if that’s what my career was. To me, a career is something you are passionate about. It drives you. It feeds your soul. It’s going to work and not feeling like you’re working. A career is something you are meant to do, and something you are meant to do for a very, very long time.

 

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No, I am not telling you to storm into your boss’s office and quit your job. Really, don’t do that. You still have bills to pay. But I do encourage you to find your passion. Find your purpose, whatever that is. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong or stupid. Or that it’s not worth it. Life is way too short to spend a majority of your days doing something that leaves you feeling hollow or unfulfilled. A career should be strengthening. It should be enlightening and exciting.  It should make you feel whole.

 

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